– Jesus, could you smile at me? – I asked in my mind, standing as a nine-year-old in the church in front of the picture of Jesus Christ. He didn’t do it even once.
But a few weeks later, I had a dream; Jesus came to me, identical to the one in that painting, but now He was in our garden. And He smiled at me!
For me, God has always existed and was friendly, but I remembered Him less and less. The following years completely changed the path of my life to this world, in which there were a lot of human worries and entertainment. Until that day….
– Iwona, I come to you because I want to say goodbye. I’m dying. – I was twenty-one years old, I was sitting in my room eating an apple, which at that moment became a bone in my throat. It was my sister-in-law. She was really dying. Her body was running out and only a miracle could save her. It was also the day when, after a five-hour conversation with her, she said: „I don’t know how you feel about God, but if you believe, please pray for me.”
And so I did. Unusual faith and determination entered me; I prayed for her as I could, every day; more so that she would leave peacefully and be saved. I did not count on a miracle, although I dreamed about it quietly. And it happened.
S. a few months later was completely healed – it was entirely God’s merit, which she received a word from the Scriptures on a regular basis – literally about what God would heal then – and it was happening!
She returned to the world of the living, and I already made friends with God. He was my support, hope, joy, being with him changed me, according to the well-known principle: who keeps company with the wolves will learn to howl.
I remember that day. On April 1, 2005, I woke up and what was in my heart … it wasn’t a joke. Pure love has settled in me. I did not know the biblical concepts, I did not know the terms that Christians use when speaking about new birth, I did not belong to any community, I did not go to church, but I remember that I called S. and said: „It is very strange, difficult to believe, but I have the feeling that Jesus himself came to me and dwelled in me!
I was full of love, joy, great peace and indescribable freedom! I also gained new eyes; I saw more, more spiritually than carnally, I looked at the everyday world, such as the day before, but now I saw it through the spiritual prism – unknown to me before. When I thought about people who hurt me – there was one feeling in me: love. No „buts”. Only love.
My friends didn’t recognize me; they were both shocked and amazed at my change. And I only talked to them about love. And about Jesus.
It was also a time when God communicated with me mainly through biblical texts. I could cite a whole lot of these examples! It happened almost everywhere. One of those significant was the baptism decision; as soon as a wave of love poured into all my being (not just my heart!), I suddenly knew that I had to be baptized! I couldn’t sleep because of my emotions!
In the end, I was assigned a distant date … .. I was waiting for it with longing, I wanted it so much that I sobbed on the bus! Then I learned that I can shorten these torments, there was the date of baptism a week earlier, and because I was a spiritual baby and I didn’t make any decision without my Daddy … I fell to my knees and together with S. we asked God if I was to be baptized earlier. Then inside me I was told to open the Bible. The first words I saw were:
And now what are you waiting for? Get up, be baptized and wash your sins away, calling on his name.(Acts 22:16)
Let me come back three years earlier, retrospectively.
I grew up without a father and it never bothered me. On the contrary! I couldn’t imagine what you could do with THAT father? What does the house in which the man lives look like? It didn’t seem attractive to me and I was finally happy that I didn’t have a second parent. By the time.
At twenty, suddenly, no one knows where the lack of father fell on me like a boulder, overwhelming me. I thought about it days and nights, feeling a void that cannot be filled, as if this void had been waiting for twenty years not to let me live!
Then I turned to God with these words: „I do not know if you exist and are interested in me, maybe it is so. They tell, you that you can do anything. You can’t do one thing; you can’t give me a father and fill this emptiness. You can’t do this one thing. „
It wasn’t a long time when one day I felt filled and I knew it was THAT lack. God in response to my „you can’t” literally bombarded me; completely and once and for all He filled my lack of father to the brim with Himself.
What happened later … I can quote an evangelist:
Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written. (John 21:25)
My book is still being written, and anyone who reads it is encouraged to come today personally, privately to Jesus and tell him: „I want to write the book of my life with you” – I assure you that the first thing Jesus will do is to make you carta blanca, and then, if you just surrender to his novel ideas and are open to collecting materials for the book, an adventure book will be created from your life – some will call it science fiction or fantasy; until they start their adventure with the Author themselves: -)
God bless you!
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